Fatigue; Here’s A Great Analogy and Some Examples

ill

 Ken McKim, the husband of a woman with Crohn’s disease likens fatigue to if a healthy person went around chronically sleep deprived (but at least in their case they can sleep extra and improve their situation), whereas with fatigue we can’t.
5 Till 6
He proposes that healthy people do an experiment for one week in which they stay up all night except for 4 hours and the next day do all their normal activities, then when they go to bed set their alarm to go off every hour and stay up for 10 minutes each time they turn it off before going back to sleep.
He says that by the end of such an experiment one should have more empathy as to what those of us with fatigue go through. It occurred to me that this would be a good experiment for all medical students because even with all their cramming for exams they probably still don’t get the full effect of what it’s like to have a chronic illness.
Doctor let down
I woke up this morning and took a shower, and felt alert just long enough to eat some breakfast, but as soon as that was over my energy drained away again. I again felt exhausted and have been finding it hard not to drift off to sleep without warning in the middle of swhatever I’m doing. I go from being exhausted but awake to suddenly finding that I’ve drifted off (only after I’ve done so and wake up).
Atlas Statue
Back when I was seeing the sleep medicine specialist at Emory I was supposed to have a daytime sleep study to rule out Narcolepsy but in order to do that you had to sleep 6 hours first and at the time I couldn’t do it because of the myoclonus keeping me from falling asleep and then once I did, people were tinkering with equipment in my room waking me up because of the noise and light coming in the door.
Looking up at doctors after fainting
Nevertheless I can make a pretty educated guess that the fatigue caused by my chronic illness has alot to do with these sleep cycle abnormalities, particularly the central nervous system problems I have which affect the autonomic nervous system. In order for the brain to function correctly it first must have enough energy. The nighttime sleep studies I had did yield some important information in that my sleep/wake cycle is royally messed up showing Delta waves at the beginning (even before falling asleep) when they are only supposed to be showing up in the last sleep stage.
brain waves on screen
This was also documented in just about every EEG I’ve ever had since second grade when I was first brought to a neurologist because of near fainting spells. Some research has proposed that there may be a mitochondrial component to the severe fatigue suffered by people with chronic illnesses.
in bed
PubMed has numerous papers that have been published on the subject and in recent years there have been more and more scientists interested in this angle. The papers shown under the search Mitochondrial Component to Fatigue will bring up papers you can look through and print out those you feel pertinent to give to your doctor. It is not uncommon for doctors to try to dismiss research as being from “junk science journals” etc., but the papers linked in PubMed are considered fully legitimate professional medical journal articles from all over the world.
GQ Style Doctor
Don’t accept a doctor’s sweeping generalization that because studies were published in foreign journals outside the United States (or outside your country if you live elsewhere) that they are not legitimate sources. There are many fine and well designed and documented studies that come out of places like the Netherlands, Australia, and even Asian countries or India. You’d be surprised where some of the most cutting edge research comes from.
Never Settle
Also, don’t be afraid to write some of the investigators listed on these research teams. They often provide an email address in order to give the public an oppourtunity to communicate with them and ask questions. By doing so you just might find out about important studies that are accepting participants that would benefit people with your condition and these scientists might even have suggestions that your doctor can try to treat your condition more effectively right now!

If your doctor is offended by this and unwilling to discuss these new approaches with you, chances are you have the wrong doctor.

Dishonest Doctor
Remember that if you have severe fatigue you only have so much energy to work with in a day and a truly good doctor will understand this and respect and appreciate the fact that you put in the time to take an active role in your healthcare and bring him this written material. If he/she truly has your best interest at heart he/she will then genuinely look into these options for diagnosis and/or treatment and will take the legwork from there.
Blindfolded-159623
Way too often we as patients end up doing their jobs for them because of their stubborness and inflated ego, because they have too much false pride to admit when they need to consult professionals who know more than they do.
Doctors in rounds
This is when the relationship becomes more about their needs than yours and if after trying to present them with this information they reject it out of hand more than a few times, it is likely that they ultimately won’t give you the care you need and deserve.

It should never be OK with a doctor to allow you to suffer any more than absolutely necessary and if there are still options left not to use them.

I had to learn that after I nearly wore myself out because I found myself working harder than my GP at Emory. At first when things weren’t getting completed and questions weren’t answered I thought maybe it just slipped his mind because of his patient load or the time got away from him, but I am very conscienscous about following up and at some point had to face the fact that my doctor was not the benevolent and altruistic person I thought he was and that chances are no amount of education was going to change that.

Any doctor that takes patient reports out of the equation might as well just turn in his medical license right now because he’s no longer acting in the patient’s best interest, he is treating his patient as an inanimate object.

For a chronically ill highly educated patient (which most of us become after so many years) it is imperative to have a doctor who bottom line accepts that this is the patients’ body and that with their being a competent adult over the age of 18 only the patient has the right to make the ultimate decision in treatment. A doctor can only advise based on his training. He cannot be inside your body to prove what your body is experiencing and how it affects you, nor how much suffering you can stand. Objective testing is only a tool and physicians have to realize that it can’t always detect everything beyond a shadow of a doubt. It has its limitations, and the clinical presentation is equally, if not more important in assessing what’s going on medically.
Doctor giving bad news
Prolonged fatigue is one of those symptoms that science does not have the knowledge to fully quantify, nevertheless it is very real and cannot be dismissed as psychological, or irrelevant information. To do so is very dangerous, because fatigue is a very good indicator that something is in fact seriously wrong in the body.
Healthy patients do not have this level of fatigue, and the distinction between fatigue and depression, for instance, is that patients with fatigue want to do things, they wish they could, but just don’t have the stamina. People who are depressed generally lose interest in hobbies and things they liked to do previously.
Creating
I can attest to this distinction, as I have interests that have continued throughout my illness and I remain enthusiastic and interested in them. It bothers me when I can only watch them in videos and not partcipate because of my level of illness.  I am fatigued yet I’m anything but apathetic. I love life and look at each day as an adventure!
Inspired Woman
An example is this; I absolutely love snakes and have two Ball Pythons. Many of the people I’m involved with online surrounding this interest travel to reptile shows where they can pick out snakes and supplies and caging for them in-person and meet up. I would really love to do that, but seeing as there are only two a year a distance away outside Atlanta, (in Cobb County) I have problems getting there with handicap transportation, and it tacks at least 2 more hours onto my day including a transfer to another county service if I were to book the trip. (Not to mention it costs double fare).
precariously holding boxes
Then if I were to stay a decent number of hours to be able to see everything, I would be sicker by the time I returned home. If I went in somebody’s car I could leave when I became too exhausted, but on public transit you can’t do that. (A time is prearranged to return and if you need to leave earlier they will not accommodate you no matter how ill you are).
Navigation
I would love to go to the big reptile show at Tinley Park (in Illinois) but not only am I not able to afford the travel and hotel for several days, the travel itself would be too taxing for me right now.
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Another example; I really love art and have been trying to come up with other forms of art I can make that don’t require so much fine motor dexterity and although I’ve found some that are easier for my hands when I actually began doing these projects I found them to be incredibly exhausting and take me much longer than they should. I actually sweat with the effort it requires, and either really pay for it in the several days that follow or have to stop before I get it done. This is very frustrating because my motivation is still there but I can’t complete the task or at the times I do I do it with great negative consequences.
Shoveling coins
My best guess in treating fatigue would be to use compounds that directly address a mitochondrial disconnect, so if any of you reading this find new developments in this area of science please feel free to post them here in the comments, as it might really help others suffering with the same barriers. Please post sources if you can.
Barrier
Somehow the patient community must get these ideas across to doctors in clinical practice so that rather than disengaging from us when our illness is prolonged they look at it as something worth working on. Even if a cure is not close by, there can be a sense of accomplishment for both patient and doctor by adopting an investigative approach and trying things even if just based on theory.
Interview
Sooner or later improvement will likely happen with that type of perseverence. That is better than doing nothing, regarding the patient as hopeless and a “treatment failure”, and just tuning them out. That should never be the response to a complicated case. Just like pain, the continuing fatigue a patient experiences is a signal from the body that the doctor’s job is not complete.

Why Doctors Don’t Come Clean To Their Patients

A True Apology - Make It Right

Brian Goldman, Leana Wen, Archie Cochran, are all doctors who dared to challenge the status quo.

When Leana Wen decided to become a doctor she was inspired by her childhood pediatrician, a woman who allowed her patients to know her, not only as a doctor, but as a person, showed a sense of humor, and treated them not as merely a body, but as a human being with dignity, relating to each patient person-to-person.

Dr. Wen went through medical school and residency with this role model in mind and when she graduated and became a doctor she never fully realized how insular and secretive a microcosm the field of medicine had become until she shared with a group of colleagues and merely proposed “why not be transparent to our patients?” This innocent question suddenly made her a target for a full frontal attack on her by those very people who were supposed to be her peers and supporters.

Archie Cochran, a doctor and a prisoner in a German prison camp during WWII challenged the status quo and the mystique that doctors often embrace when he realized that prisoners were lacking in Vitamin B12 and Vitamin C. Not only were other prisoners suffering from a mysterious illness but so was he. He has Marmite (an English bread rich in Vitamin C) smuggled into the prison. Informally he gives half of the prisoners B12 and the other half Vitamin C and their illness improves. He publishes his findings but feels that nobody will listen or care about what he’s discoverd.

Later a young German doctor discovers the material, is shocked this is happening, and says to his colleagues that something must be done; that this data is irrefutable and that it is actually a war crime not to provide vitamins to those prisoners. Next morning lo and behold vitamins show up at the prison.

After he himself had recovered in the prisoner of war camp, Archie Cochran later spoke before colleagues at a lecture in which he presented findings of a clinical trial he’d conducted on whether heart attack patients recovered better at home or in the hospital. The prevailing thought at that time said that patients recovered better in the hospital and that having them recover at home was absolutely “unethical!” In his presentation he initially told them his hypothesis that patients recover better in their own homes was wrong and that he stood corrected. There was an uprorious response to this announcement delivered with lots of hate hurled at him, denouncing him and in effect they called him an idiot, telling him he was killing people and to shut the experiment down….Only that’s not where it ends.

Once the din subsided he resumed his speech and proceeded to reveal that in fact he had not been wrong and that the statistics he’d read them were actually reversed! He explained that the study showed that people in fact recovered better in their homes than in the hospital. In response to this earthshattering revelation you could hear a pin drop; no uproar, no cheers, no congratulations, but instead a chill that permeated the lecture hall as his colleagues seethed in silent anger in their seats.

In this video by Tim Harford, a writer on economics uses the analogy of design of a product to illustrate why using trial and error in todays complex medical system is important, why doctors should not be put off by what they may view or be told are “unproven” theories or treatments, and why approaching the job with humility actually works better than to adopt a stance toward patients of omniscience and omnipotence.

Medical books and the long drawn-out and rigid standard of placebo-controlled clinical trials don’t always work when you’re working with real people in the real world, and a one-size-fits-all approach to patient care ultimately sells patients short. As Tim Harford says, “People are not machines. It’s not like fixing a car.”

When the doctor cuts patients out of the process and expects total “obedience”, “compliance” rather than a meeting of the minds with an aim to solve a problem he/she loses a valuable opportunity because even out of mistakes can come happy accidents, and ultimately important medical discoveries.

If what is written in the books is in fact wrong that causes improper treatment of patients for years. As one former paramedic friend said to me, “Bodies don’t read books.” This is why the doctor patient relationship and listening to the patient should come before any textbook. Just because a book says “If a patient has these symptoms you must do X” one shouldn’t apply this across the board as if it were a pat formula for all patients who have such symptoms.

Throughout history theories have been accepted by mainstream medicine and then decades or centuries later, dismissed as outdated. It is tragic that many pioneers in the field of medicine who challenged prevailing thought were persecuted for doing so, sometimes until death, and that many were never recognized for their important contributions when they were alive.

Doctors are expected to know everything and never make mistakes (not by patients but by their own peers). They are “kept in line” by their own profession, and outed for being non-conformists and trying empirical or off-label treatment approaches (as is often the case with doctors treating chronic Lyme Disease and Chronic Fatigue/ME patients).

When they expose real corruption in their peers, report them for patient abuse or neglect, and/or their place of employment or refuse to be a part of it their careers are often threatened and sometimes destroyed. What is done to patients by doctors in the form of gaslighting and character assassination is the direct mirror image of what their peers and employers do to them if/when they attempt to go out on a limb for their patient(s). It doesn’t even have to have happened yet to a particular doctor. Just the fear and unspoken “threat” that it could by virtue of urban legends and talk around the water cooler is enough for most doctors to “stay in their place” and too often fail to act in a patient’s best interest.

Drawing outside the lines can have dire consequences. This is made clear in subtle and sometimes not so subtle ways along the path of a doctor’s career. A patient may be left dangling and minimally or untreated for months and even years because a doctor is more afraid of the corporation that employs him or what other doctors might say or do to him than afraid that a patient may get worse, die, or that a family may sue.

Why? Because when conventional treatments don’t work sufficiently a doctor is often given the message (and sometimes directed by policy) by the employer he works for to do nothing. If he sides with the employer and does nothing and a patient dies, gets worse, or a family sues, he is shielded by the corporation he works for and they take the heat as his supervisor which legally is ultimately the responsible party, however, if he sides with his patient against the recommendation of his employer and or most widely accepted treatment practices of his profession it is highly likely his employer will either fire him or claim they had no knowledge of his actions and claim he is singly responsible should anything go wrong.

Most doctors in today’s “managed care” environment work for corporations, therefore they stay “on the safe side” often to the detriment of their patients. They become comfortable as puppets of the corporation in exchange for certain comforts and immunity provided them because of the power and wealth of the entity which employs them such as a Legal Department, Dept, of Patient Relations, Risk Management Dept. etc. The corporation may offer them some sort of 401K or retirement benefits, they don’t have to worry about overhead, nor do they have to hire office staff or billing staff and pay them out of their profits as they would if they were in private practice. They give up a considerable amount of decision-making power and autonomy in return for those perks…and oftentimes they sell their soul.

There is one unwritten rule that all doctors working for a corporation are expected to live by; to uphold the reputation of the corporation they work for. The employer may or may not officially put this in their contract, but the implication is clear and unmistakable.

The moment a doctor signs on to such an arrangement he/she takes on the face of the corporation. For the same reason that large gifts of money from special interest groups to state and federal legislators and people running for office are problematic, so is this kind of working relationship in which a doctor is “housed” within a healthcare company. From that moment onward a doctor has divided loyalties. It is likely that doctors in such environments are confronted with daily ethical dilemmas of one type or another, but as patients we rarely hear about them.

For the patients reading; how many of your doctors have openly admitted that their employer instructed them to do something they didn’t ethically agree was in your best interest? I doubt very many have. And as Dr. Leana Wen suggests wouldn’t it be better if they openly disclosed this to you, and said, for instance, “I agree with you that it makes sense to try this treatment but I’m afraid I would lose my job if I move forward to order it.” Only then could doctor and patient stay alligned, engage in effective disalogue, and figure out how to handle that obstacle. Instead what too often happens is that the doctor presents the circumstances very differently, refusing to accept valid reasons or proof offered by the patient as to why this would be a good course of action, denying the existance of a condition, falling back on a dictatorial or hostile stance, even questioning a patients’ sanity or motives (none of which are effective coping mechanisms in their work, and only serve to place doctor and patient at odds).

That said, doctors do have their part of the responsability to put their patients first. While as patients we can acknowledge that doctors have pressures placed upon them these facts do not excuse doctors from the responsibility for placing highest priority on the health, safety, and wellbeing of their patients. Whatever conflict-of-interest that may exist in their relationship with their employer they, not we have chosen that trade-off and it is up to them to find a way out of this divided loyalty conundrum.

I get it that they’re often scared to make a move on behalf of their patients for fear of retribution or retaliation from either peers or employer, but it is encumbent upon them that they refuse to trade our comfort for their own.

Gold Caduceus

The symbol of Caduceus, a staff  with wings and two snakes wrapping around it in Greek Mythology was carried by Hermes. In Roman Mythology it was carried in the left hand of Murcury who was said to be the messenger of the Gods (emphasis on the word, Messenger). Not God himself, LOL. Here’s an excerpt from that article;

“It is said that the wand would wake the sleeping and send the awake to sleep. If applied to the dying their death was gentle; if applied to the dead they returned to life.”

Another symbol, The Rod of Asclepius is often used to denote the field of medicine and it seems was the original symbol.

Nevertheless, the original message was supposed to be that doctors were given this responsibility by God, a mission to attend to the health of their patients. It was never meant for them to abuse the power that comes with the responsibility against their patients just because there are currently no legal consequences. It is a moral imperative. This message also comes through loud and clear in the Hippocratic Oath.

It is said that in order to change a person must first admit there’s a problem. When I was abused, bullied and defamed at Emory Healthcare I was only given empty apologies. “I’m sorry you’re not satisfied” is not a sincere apology. I tried to suggest a number of solutions including my being on their board of directors, getting involved in sensitivity training for their residents, and a number of other ideas but every one of my suggestions for conflict resolution was turned down. They weren’t interested in fixing the problem THEY created because they weren’t willing to take the first step in admitting there was a problem.

A genuine apology involves 3 important parts;

“I’m sorry”,

“It’s my fault. I was wrong”, and

“What can I do to make it right?” Then really doing it.

There are some doctors who got this right and then began a dialogue with patients to improve relations. Here is one of them. He says studies have shown that in addition to being the right thing to do, apologizing actually makes the risk of lawsuits less likely. Patients really are not wanting to sue and generally only do that as a last resort when a doctor absolutely refuses to accept responsability for his actions. In fact most patients just want the mistake or wrong decision corrected so they can go on with their treatment and go on with their lives.

It seems that the root of the problem lies in that there are too many middle-men between doctor and patient who have no business being there in the first place and that further confuses a doctor as to what his job description is and who it is he is there to serve. The power structure in too many medical facilities as it exists today encourages (if not dictates) that doctors sacrifice their patients’ best interest in order to save themselves in a hostile work environment where doing the right thing is frowned upon heavily.

In fact, doctors are actually reinforced for putting a patients’ best interest last, corporation first, and him/serself second.

Solution

In a word? Unbundling. Quite simply corporate-controlled healthcare doesn’t work in the long-term for most of those in it (except for those in top-heavy positions in administration who are making six figures or more). It doesn’t work for doctors, it doesn’t work for nurses, and it doesn’t work for patients.

Doctors must find creative ways to practice outside these corporations which now have bought and paid for so many’s silence and collusion. The cycle of abuse has to stop and doctors need to go back to working for and with patients as the profession was originally intended.

Sign the petition for a legislated system of accountability for all chains of command. This is just the beginning of a new system of healthcare.

Diagnosis is a Winding Road; Finally Getting Somewhere!

Just like my refrigerator which has finally gone caput after intermittantly working and not, my body has persisted in giving signals which cannot be overlooked forever. Finally, finally there has been a break in the case! I received a call … Continue reading

Art is My Therapy; How One Woman Deals with Trauma from Abuse By “Medical Professionals” and The Daily Grind of Chronic Illness

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Giant Health Product Giveaway Nov. 23rd – Dec. 3rd! Lots of Prizes!

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GA Medical Board Fails To Take Disciplinary Action Against Doctors Involved in Abuse and Corporate Cover-up

It was no big surprise when I received the long, white envelope with the Georgia Composite Medical Board logo on it that the outcome was a bust. Georgia’s track record for disciplining doctors for infractions is especially bad compared to … Continue reading

Trump Presidency Bad For People with Chronic Illness/Disabilities

capitol-diagram

Tuesday November 8th’s 2016 political upset was a wake-up call to all of us in the chronic illness community that we have our work cut out for us when it comes to our quest for respect, equal representation, and full inclusion (which includes having our medical needs met in a timely manner).

The worst of it is not just the opinions espoused by Donald Trump, but that these same bigotted opinions appear with such frequency among average citizens in modern society, and that they can and do drive the making of public policy; AKA…the rules that govern our real lives! 

Despite that many are uncomfortable discussing and even thinking about politics, the reality is that where the rubber meets the road policy gets made with or without our input.

stubborn-as-a-mule

The challenge in the face of such a punishing blow as we saw earlier this week is to stay engaged and not give up the good fight for what we know is right. Better that policy be created with our input than without, and under our watchful eye than in the secrecy of smoky back rooms.

Ari Ne’amen, the President of Autistic Self-advocacy Network, calls the election of Donald Trump “a disaster” and predicts that if Trump actually follows through with the things he has stated he plans to do once in office the risk for people with disabilities is serious and very real.

We already know that one of Donald Trump’s big goals is to “repeal Obama-care” the Affordable Care Act. Along with this is the Medicaid expansion for people whose income is too low to qualify for the Affordable Care Act Insurance Market, large numbers of working poor who otherwise are cheated out of health insurance benefits by greedy big corporations who employ them often at starvation wages, cut their hours, and pull other ploys to avoid providing them any long-term job stability and financial security just to pay the top brass more. He has even stated that he’d like to do away with a minimum wage altogether! (Clearly he’s not looking out for the American worker’s best interest, but instead the interests of big corporations).

if-there-were-no-minimum-wage-employers-would-pay-nothing

We already know that Donald Trump is unsympathetic/unempathetic to the plights of undocumented immigrants who have often had to flee deadly drug cartels and other terrorists on an emergency basis to come to the US for safe refuge.

His comments regarding Latinos are especially heinous referring to them in such derrogatory terms as killers and rapists , casting aspersions upon the Mexican Government as if to imply that infiltrating our country with unsavory characters were their intent! 

He kicked a New York Times reporter of Latino descent out of an Iowa news conference and had him forcibly removed, and he has made derrogatory remarks about former candidate Jeb Bush implying that he was unfairly biased for Spanish speaking people because his wife was Latino. Most distubing of all anti-Latino comments was his response when confronted with a situation in which a Hispanic man was beaten in his own home by Trump supporters; stating that his supporters were “passionate”.

No, I’m sorry to break it to His Highness, but THAT’s not merely “passionate”. THAT is a HATE CRIME! “Passionate” is peaceful protest, or a civil debate of the issues.

His blithe response and gross minimization regarding this act of discrimination, hatred and violence is dangerous in that it has the effect of normalizing something that should never be socially acceptable in a civil society! It tells others out there who do not want to control their anger and who believe the rules and laws don’t apply to them that violence is OK as long as you are doing it in the name of a belief (however instrinsically immoral it may be). The now President Elect almost seemed to gloat over the fact that such violence could be passively incited in his name.

We must ask ourselves; if he’d turn his head to this sort of hate crime how many other civil rights issues will he turn his head to as President?

And it’s not only immigrants he disrespects. It’s women, too. I think most of us have seen at least a few off-color comments he’s made on the news or on Twitter, coverage of his intention to reduce a woman’s right to free choice and other equal rights issues for women such as opposing equal pay in the workplace, but you may not have been aware of this very graphic video which caught blatently sexist and denigrating comments he made about/against women here .

trumps-denigration-of-women

Notice here that Trump dismisses the severity of his salacious remarks and fails to take responsability for his clearly treating women as though they were objects to be conquered for his own narcissistic gratification. He only apologizes that anyone “was offended,” not that he did it. Sound familiar??? It’s the same sort of non-apology Emory Healthcare issued in their letters which stated “sorry you aren’t satisfied.”

And speaking of big corporations; Trump has on numerous occasions stated his intention if elected to roll back regulation on big corporations, so it is likely that what happened to me is not the last time this atrocity will happen to an innocent patient, and the offending healthcare corporations will get away with it. If anything our country is in need of more regulation of big corporations; not less!

corporate-greed

They’re already running rough-shod over us individuals and the fox is charged with guarding the henhouse leaving big gaps in justice for those with little power in our society. Funding has already been cut to state and local programs such as Legal Aid, and to federal programs charged with going to bat for people who find themselves discriminated against and stuck out in the cold.

As I have outlined in earlier posts; people with Autism/Aspergers and other little-known and poorly understood conditions that frankly doctors and healthcare systems would rather pretend don’t exist than to treat receive short shrift when it comes to services. They are considered costly and time-intensive and therefore a bother to such corporations, so there is much pressure to down-grade the level of care to individuals with such conditions, and if that doesn’t fly they are dumped summarily with very little public outcry resulting and next to no real advocate.

Considering that the numbers of people with many of these (as corporate healthcare sees them) “nuisance” conditions are rapidly becoming the majority and (it goes with out saying) these are a formidable voting block. This is what we must impress upon the masses and upon Congress in our efforts to educate and consciousness-raise.

While our kind may still be considered less crucial/less important and our views less influential in forming our country’s priorities, we are a rapidly growing segment of the population and one day soon we will be a demographic that politicians wish to court.

Trump seems to have a penchant for insulting people with disabilities employed by the media. I guess deep down (well not so deep really, LOL) he doesn’t believe that people with disabilities can be strong contributing professionals of news agencies.

During an NBC News interview he slammed a columnist, Charles Krauthammer, who is paralyzed from the waist down specifically using his disability as the butt of his mean joke; “Then I get called by a guy that can’t buy a pair of pants, I get called names? Give me a break.” It wasn’t enough for him to insult the man’s stance on the war in Iraq and other topics, and to call him “underrated,” but to attack his having a disability and his needing help for that disability is beyond the pale. 

If anyone has any doubt that a Trump Presidency is harmful to the interests of the ill and disabled you have only to watch this clip in which he mocks in one of his speeches the spasticity in a reporter’s hands, Serge Kovaleski who has arthrogryposis, a joint condition.  

He later goes on to accuse him of “grandstanding about his disability.” Further, he questions “his level of intelligence”, painting him as a nobody that is too unimportant for Trump to remember. Nice attempt at gaslighting, Trump, but a big fail; the sarcastic impression shown in the above video speaks for itself.

Pretty appalling, huh! You might expect this kind of juvenile banter from a prepubescent hamming it up and trying to garner some street cred with his friends/peers by picking on those he views as easy targets, but not from the (now) leader of the free world (soon to be alot less free than before if we don’t stay on task in standing our collective ground steeled against the inevitable attempts to cut corners on those he deems not viable enough). 

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Trump’s assault on disabled people isn’t even limited to his liberal detractors.

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Even veterans with disabilities have been subjects of his particular type of abuse, including John McCain about whom he openly stated that he didn’t understand why people considered him a war hero after being captured and held for years in a prisoner-of-war camp, forced to endure horrendous and permanently crippling torture. Trump’s audacious comment that he “prefers soldiers who were not captured” is another telling remark of honking disrespect and lack of empathy which gives a clear indication of his values, and motivations.

stress-and-strain

It strongly hints at his predatory and orwellian view of the haves versus the have-nots; the viewing of the underdog as somehow less viable, therefore less deserving than his more advantaged counterpart. His singling out of various groups to be badly regarded thus badly treated is another version of the concept of Untermenschen; a term coined in Nazi Germany during WW II; (translated: Under Man, or sub-human) made new again.

trump-american-hitler

The type of thinking Donald Trump engages in is of the same mind-set espoused by Hitler and other such dictators who went on to carry out their horrendous bias in policy. It seems I am not the only blogger who sees that parallel!

Michelle Obama stated it very accurately in a speech made earlier illustrating why Donald Trump is wrong for America.

She says; “Maybe it’s easy for him to mock people with disabilities because he’s unable to see their strength and their contributions.”

That, my people, is the root of discrimination; the inability to see a certain demographic’s value and the inability to view them as bringing something important to the table.

This man clearly lacks the maturity and seasoned professionalism (not to mention the experience) required for the job of President of the United States of America, and much more than merely annoying, his rhetoric is dangerous to those who due to medical conditions require accommodations in order to have as much quality-of-life as possible. In politics, as in life, one might be able to con (or buy) one’s way into a job, but doing the job day in and day out is a whole other kettle of fish! 

trump_fails

It’s appalling that anyone would want somebody like this to be President, and just as appalling to hear some of the excuses being generated for his prejudices and blatant disrespect for those who are less advantaged than he. (Note that he is constantly telling us how wealthy he is. And how does that at all qualify him to run the country which includes mostly people who are not wealthy and whose lives in no way resemble his?)

trump-really-rich

Maybe in time those who voted for him will see that this was a big mistake and that in the end this is not a man who represents their values, and maybe they will move for a reversal. (I hear that Michael Moore predicts he won’t last the 4 years). Only time will tell, but those of us who’ve known this all along must continue to shine a light on the humanity that is lacking and the restoration of which is so badly needed, and keep working to improve things for people with disabilities/the chronically ill.

For those who are interested in an update on me; I will get one up soon. For a number of reasons I have found it hard to write over the past month. I had a spoon left tonight and just felt that this topic was screaming to be put down on paper given the timeliness of the election, as its ramifications affects all of us.

 

Managing Fatigue, and Conserving Energy

50 mg. Caramels horizontal view - Nutrient Bomb DSC_0001

Caramels – 50 Mg. each

                 25 Mg. Hard Candy     25 Mg.Capsules

With extreme fatigue I find it’s important to pace myself and to look for products, activities, and strategies that might at least over time increase my energy level or at least conserve it as much as possible.

One thing I am very interested in (especially since it has become more and more difficult to tolerate solid food) is Cannabis edibles. (I have been sampling a few that melt away to compare effectiveness, as all the pills I’m taking now are about to gag me).

While none of the products I’ve tried is the “real” stuff with all the elements of the plant, I know that as nutrients some of these products have at least some nutritional benefits of the hemp they are made from.

The above Fleur de sel Caramels with sea salt purchased from a small maker called Nutrient Bomb where I ordered on Etsy have an interesting flavor almost like black tea, and smooth and very stretchy texture. The seller also sent me a few of their other products as free samples. The pills I’m not really keen on (for the reason I mentioned earlier), but the hard candy squares were pretty good tasting and I couldn’t taste the CBD, although the flavor was hard to identify; somewhere between cinnamon, cherry, and mild menthol.

If nothing else, I’m trying to eat 1 caramel a day (I just got 9 to test out and see whether they improve my energy level or GI symptoms). So far I’ve only had 3 days to try them.

After seeing a new Gastroenterologist the day before yesterday I discovered that I have really lost alot of weight. I knew my pants were beginning to fall off me but it did’t hit me how extreme it really was until she mentioned it. I’ve started losing my hair too and it has on occasion literally fallen out of my head right in front of me without provocation! I have been finding it all over my bed sheets, clothing, etc., even on the carpet. I don’t know if it’s some sort of endocrine problem or what. It’s very strange, though. I hope it doesn’t continue dropping at this rate or I might end up bald!

My muscles often burn and even the slightest exertion takes everything out of m so I’m trying to conserve energy as much as possible.

I find that one of the best ways to do this is to literally sleep whenever I feel I need to and not force myself to stay awake because of the time of day or what I’m doing.

Sometimes I need to sleep alot more hours than normal in order to have the stamina to shower once a week, and since I currently don’t have anyone to help me I just can’t do it everyday as I would like to. I have to let certain activities go out of sheer necessity.

I find that alternating activities more often helps as well. Changing positions is very important if you are bed-bound because you are less likely to develop pressure sores, and if you have chronic pain and muscle spasm that’s triggered by sitting squarely putting pressure on your butt, then shifting to one side or the other can make things easier.

Being in pain in itself can wear down your energy and aggravate fatigue and it can make you irritable. I find sometimes pain creeps up on me before I realize it (because I’m so used to it), and all of a sudden I feel awful. I try to identify as best as I can when I’m starting to have pain and take my pain medication as soon as I notice it.

At times I have mistaken it for fatigue when it was actually pain starting up. I have now become pretty good at recognizing this pain aura and know when I need to take care of it to prevent a cycle of pain and fatigue from being set off.

As I also have some severe sensory issues I know about my body that I cannot tolerate any type of suffering for very long before I’m in all-out sensory overload. Symptoms I find are causing significant distress need to be taken care of expeditiously; no waiting around and procrastinating. They need to be treated now. This is something I was not able to get through to my GP, but it is absolutely crucial that any physician working with me understand this and respect it because it’s not that I’m being demanding or being a diva, but that I really can’t stand it. With the way I am wired, this is not a choice or a mere matter of convenience as some may assume, it is a need.

So if any of you readers are in the same boat it might be good to try to have a talk with your doctors about this as early as possible. If they are truly interested in helping you they will understand and try to accommodate you. If not, then it’s better to find out sooner than later after you’ve become invested in that doctor/patient relationship and find a doctor who will understand and meet you where you’re at on this.

Maybe I made the mistake of not telling mine this soon enough, but I think I was less aware of it almost 13 years ago when I began seeing him, so I’m not sure I could have made the connection back then. It has been a long process of self-discovery to fully understand how my brain and body works, but now I know alot more than I knew then and often learned things through rough trial and error.

It takes more energy for me to withstand protracted suffering (pain, stomach upset, near syncope, etc.) than it might be for somebody who does not have sensory issues. It’s as if somebody turned a dial way up and the longer I go with untreated symptoms the more excruciating it is. Someone who does not experience this themselves cannot ever fully relate, but a truly compassionate doctor will take your word for it and not expect you to jump through yet more tiring hoops that only make your life more difficult and deplete your energy.

My not being treated for my Dysautonomia since November, I’m sure, has taken a toll on me both physically and emotionally, and it occurred to me that it might actually be causing me to burn fat and muscle at an unhealthy rate. I suspect I’m probably in ketosis.

This state will deplete the little energy you have remaining very quickly. I’m trying to drink some Pomegranate juice I still have in the house in-between drinking my ice water, as Pomegranate is a super-fruit filled with anti-oxidants and has lots of nutrients in it.

When I need something from the kitchen I try to bring everything in there I need to at the same time, and everything back from the kitchen I need at the same time.

Although I’m in a power wheelchair I get fatigued very quickly just sitting in an upright position and the one I currently have has no neck or headrest so my neck can’t hold out unsupported for more than about 15 minutes.

Having the right adaptive equipment can make quite a difference. I’m working on getting a better chair that will support my body more equally and allow me to recline if I suddenly start to feel faint when I’m up.

Whenever possible I also try to put my forearms on the counter when preparing something, I now don’t bother putting dishes inside the cupboard like I used to, but keep them on the counter so that I don’t have to reach and strain to get a plate or a bowl after taking them out of the dishwasher.

Mental concentration for long periods of time tires me out, so I try to break up those activities and when I feel worse I stop and either lie down and totally rest or sleep, or I do something that requires less intense concentration.

I recently went onto Listia , (which for those who are unfamiliar with it is a site where you can get items for points rather than money), and bid on and won two adult coloring books. Being an artist who is used to drawing, painting, and making jewelry, when I saw these becoming popular my first impression was that is was a little bit wussy to color prefab designs.

However, as I have gradually lost some fine motor abilities in my hands when it comes to the type of art I have done for years and now find impossible and frustrating, I understand the appeal of these for adults with chronic disease.

I think what it is that is so freeing about these is that certain types of executive functioning such as planning out where to position an original design on paper, perspective, and composition require the artist to expend alot of energy.

When you are healthy you may not even be aware of it, but when you’re ill you definitely feel as though the act of creating (the very thing you love) becomes a chore of monumental proportions!

Not being required to do these things that tax your brain and attention gives those of us with chronic illness a break from having to plan things out to the 9th degree, an activity which can sometimes just be too much, especially on days when we have alot of pain and/or fatigue and brain fog.

I would love to hear from readers what you do to conserve or increase energy. Please feel free to leave a comment and to subscribe.  🙂